Getting Old

Getting old brings biological changes
With old age cells and molecules accumulate damage
leading to a decline in physical and mental abilities. 
The metabolism slows down 
A prevalence of body fat can increase in the midriff 
this can increase the risk of health problems such as diabetes. 
Life changes such as retirement or a  move to more appropriate housing can unsettle.
Old age can bring the death of friends or life partners
and you suddenly find yourself enjoying the coverage of the bowls on BBC 2

everything was better then

the sun always shone back when we were young
We had no responsibilities
the people we loved were still around
birthday cards came with cash inside
life was simpler
things tasted better
what was for tea was a surprise to us
chocolate bars were bigger - but we didn't know
there was food on the table 
we never appreciated how good the music was
we never listened to the radio stations we now miss
we never enjoyed the classic cars which then were just - normal 
the steam locomotives which pulled our trains
the family members we never imagined we'd loose 
we never knew how fondly we'd look back at those times
these times
times when we grumbled at having to go to school
do our homework 
Saturday jobs to earn some pocket money 
made to eat all of our veg
to eat what was put in front of us
having to go to bed at a set time
having to only watch what our parents thought appropriate 
this past 
painted with the rosy tint of retrospection
we were young and care free
everything came without cost 
the past
a time now gone 
which we remember fondly
a time we consider 
better than the time we are in now
remembered with emotional intensity 
but only the positive 
forgetting the negative 
the scraped knees which hurt us
our mind
distorting 
idealizing 
time which now deceives us
which now our mind misconstrues
the past - but not forgetting 
the present - these days now
will be the yesterdays of tomorrow 
for
everything was better then - wasn't it?

Bowls


I found myself one afternoon 
sat
watching the bowls on telly
and quite getting into it!
I had to turn it off
when I realised I was getting old

Who Knows

Everyone knows not to engage with fellow passengers whilst travelling - he didn't 
he who staggered down the carriage
hoping to engage with someone 
he whistled loudly - no-one whistles that loudly 
especially on a train 
He had a can of beer in one hand
and held onto the seat backs with the other 
as he swayed down the carriage
and 
choosing to sit opposite us - I felt my fellow travellers
immediately relax
and with another swig from the blue can 
and removing his ear-buds
he started a monologue aimed at us. 
He said something about a bad acid trip
drug taking and bad dreams
asking if we'd like to guess which country he was born in
a country; he added knowingly
which didn't exist anymore.
The answer was West Germany - so technically he was correct
but it all sounded like a well used
well rehearsed and now we'll worn opening gambit
to try and fit in
to try and find a friend - someone to engage with
someone like us.
Our somewhat autistic new friend managed to dropped in the fact he was a grammar school lad
I thought this had a ring of truth about it
but to look at him
it hadn't done him any favors
He mentioned the festival circuit 
I could see him at a few well known music festivals - but who knows  believing him was becoming harder to do!
He let slip his destination and the  station he required
which to our great fortune was coming up soon
then, mid-sentence 
he suddenly stood up and headed at some pace to the toilets - leaving nothing but a silence 
and an aroma 
it wasn't a bad aroma
just distinctive.
On his return
he walked straight passed us
choosing the seats behind ours.
I knew he was there because that familiar aroma 
climbed over the back of our seats to join us.

We didn't really know he'd gone either
he used the exit door at the other end of the carriage
off to go to - who-knows-where
off to meet- who knows?
He had money for beer and a train ticket - well I assume he'd paid for a ticket
he had a phone that was charged and which was playing music - we could hear it!
Who he was - we never found out
Was his story fact or fiction - who knows?
But he's out there now - maybe on another train
maybe heading somewhere else
looking for someone else to talk at
someone to try his 
'country which doesn't exist anymore' 
line on

...Who knows?


(haiku)

Growing old is a 
luxury; not within the 
reach of everyone 


(Haiku)

The debate. Should I
become an ex-member of
'X' or seek 'Blue Sky?