to hide from the 'bogeyman'
if he's in your head!
Durrh - Hello! (A Rant)
So the three richest men on this planet,
have a race to get away from it,
in rockets their own companies built.
Like real life "Buzz Light-years",
to colonize space,
the new empire!
Their new empire.
An empire that "Jo Average" can't afford to visit,
so they'll just have to keep flying for 10 days in Torramallinos,
and the planes they take,
will keep adding to the carbon emissions,
and thus the global warming then!
Space!
The next venture to swell the company coffers - even further!
Let's take the wild ideas even further!
Holidays in space - but only for other billionaires.
Lets build in space - so the earth might survive!
Thats right,
now we've messed up our own planet,
let's mess up the space around it!
We've already filled it with thousands of satellites so as Tracy doesn't get lost on her way to Wayne's BBQ using SAT-NAV 'cos she can't read a bloody map!
So other billionaires get to go into space and be able to look back at the mess we're making of the only home we've got,
the one and only 'rock'
amongst all the other 'rocks' we know of that will support us.
At what point do our hotter summers and warmer winters ring any bells with us?
"Ooh, look at my tan!" Tracy says, "In January too!"
Surely the signs should be calling out to us!
The flash floods,
the scorching wild fires.
...Durrh hello!?!?!
Hot Summers Day (The Long Drive Home)
Off to the beach.
Roads full of traffic.Cars pulled to the side.
Bonnets up - probably over heating!
Dads scratching heads glaring at the engine.
The recovery services turn up!
Cars with boats behind,
canoes on roofs,
bikes on roofs and hanging behind,
groaning roof boxes,
more inside,
motor homes full of stuff!
Huge motor homes pulling little cars!
...no wonder they all break down!
Queues for the carpark tickets,
Some people with no change!
"Can I pay with my phone?"
Suncream and sandals.
Deckchairs and wind breaks.
Bodies barbecuing on the beach.
Young kids in sun hats slathered in suncream.
Mums in bikinis,
Dads in their favourite football shirts.
Beer in the cool box.
Sandwiches bought from the petrol station 'cos someone forgot to make some.
Crisps and bottles of 'pop'.
Ice creams later,
and cold bottles of water,
... for a price!
Dad moans.
Arcades on piers - more expense!
Kiss me quick fish 'n' chip donkey rides.
Fun-fair candy floss slot machine arcades.
Noodles and inflatable plastic rings and floats and boats
and those shove-ha'penny machines where you always loose!
Later, mums with sun burnt shoulders.
Dads sat in deckchairs,
dreading the long drive home!
...oh the long drive home!
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